The Eclectic One

…Because labels are a poor substitute for thinking

Archive for November, 2008

An update from the front: the “War on Christmas”

Posted by Bill Nance on November 30, 2008


Today is Black Friday, the biggest shopping day of the year. 23/6 would like take a moment to commend our troops in the War on Christmas. Focus on the Family commentator Stuart Shepard might threaten you with boycotts for being “Christmas-offensive” in your refusal to demand that your employees say “Merry Christmas” to customers, but you do not blink. You brave retailers who put yourselves and your profits in harm’s way solely to strike a blow against this yearly abomination that has plagued our nation for generations, you are the stores that will be remembered when this war is won and when Christmas is nothing more than a bloody corpse trodden under the feet of Godless department store greeters everywhere. When we speak of courage, we speak of:

American Eagle

Banana Republic


Lane Bryant

Old Navy

We commend you. Because of you, this year Christmas is going to reach into its stocking and find nothing but razor blades.


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Quote of the Day

Posted by Bill Nance on November 30, 2008

“It’s burring outside Daddy!” -My daughter, at age 4, on her first exposure to snow.

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Deep thoughts…

Posted by Bill Nance on November 29, 2008

Based upon a detailed and scientific analysis of my spam, I am ready to draw three conclusions about the average American male:

  1. They have very small penises
  2. They cannot use them well and need “V-!Agr_a”
  3. They have a real thing for teenage girls named Debbie doing obscene things with farm animals

-That is all

Posted in Le Snark, Miscellaneous | Tagged: , , , | Leave a Comment »

Attention Wal-Mart shoppers

Posted by Bill Nance on November 28, 2008

This is just disgusting.

The Juice:

A worker was killed in the crush Friday after a throng of shoppers eager for post-Thanksgiving bargains burst through the doors at a suburban Wal-Mart, authorities said.

“He was bum-rushed by 200 people,” co-worker Jimmy Overby, 43, told the Daily News. “They took the doors off the hinges. He was trampled and killed in front of me. They took me down too. … I literally had to fight people off my back.”

Clearly it was very important to get that discount on the totally unneeded, usually frivolous and probably largely unwanted gifts you were out to buy in celebration of the “Prince of Peace.”   -So important you mindless cattle were willing to kill someone to get it.

Last night I was commenting to my lovely bride about how much I detest the Xmas holidays.

It’s not the Christmas, carols, many of which I love. It’s not the religious aspect, which while I don’t subscribe to the belief is certainly nothing bad or even annoying. It’s not the idea that once a year at least, we should make an attempt to be kind to one another -not a bad sentiment at all.

No, all of these Holiday traditions are just hunkey dorey as far as I’m concerned.

What disgusts me is the way we as a society approach this season: Consume, consume, consume. The holiday season hasn’t seemed to me to be anything but this consumerist gluttony for a very long time.

One of the things I’ve always been grateful for in my religious education and reading has been the sage advice and wisdom to be found in the various holy books, religious apologia and philosophy. Many of these I’ve adopted for my own moral code, and this one in particular seems apropos today:

Number two of the Seven Deadly Sins: Gluttony.

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Jay G’s new logo…sort of

Posted by Bill Nance on November 27, 2008

My wife was surfing cafe press today and found this baby. We immediately thought of our friend Jay G., our resident Preparer for the Zombie Apocalypse.

Posted in Le Snark | Tagged: , | 2 Comments »

Theocrat watch: update

Posted by Bill Nance on November 27, 2008

Ayatollah James Dobson has written a new screed, denouncing Kathleen Parker for daring to voice the opinion that a theocracy plank in the GOP platform might not be wise.

Some choice bits:

“Ms. Parker cites the election of Barack Obama as evidence that Americans no longer care much about the moral-values issues that have historically driven conservative voters to the polls.”

No, you fucking twit, it’s evidence that having an ignorant, uneducated, religious nutbag who believes in  WITCHES and thinks the world is 6,000 years old isn’t appealing to sane people as a potential president.

“The problem with that analysis is that it doesn’t hold up when you look at the results in the three states that voted on marriage-protection amendments Nov. 4. Residents of California, Florida and Arizona voted to define marriage in their constitutions as the union of one man and one woman”

That’s nothing to do with the GOP and you know it. What was voted on was fear and homophobia. If you  cock-craving closet queens would just go suck a few penises and get it out of your system, maybe you’d stop feeling so moved to inspire hate and intolerance for people whose only crime is wanting to make a life-time commitment to each other….unless you think having the two guys next door married to each other will be such a disturbing element that you’ll start uncontrollably feeling up other men in airport restrooms like the rest of your ilk.

“…it’s the notion that, because there are people of many faiths in the United States, those of the Christian faith must not think or act like Christians when engaging the public square.”

No you disgusting little troll, if you wackjob hate-mongers would actually act like Christ instead of the Scribes and Pharisees, people wouldn’t be so upset with you. Everything you do slaps Jesus in the mouth. Christ stood for love, tolerance and forgiveness. The ONLY things he repeatedly condemned and got angry with were the people who sowed hate, judgement and intolerance. Read your own book you bloody ignoramus. According to your own religion, the LAW is not the road to salvation. If Jesus was here today you’d be calling him a Socialist Fag-lover.

“That is similar to something then-Sen. Obama said a couple of years ago, arguing in a speech before a gathering of liberal Christians that “democracy demands that the religiously motivated translate their concerns into universal, rather than religion-specific, values.”

“It requires that their proposals be subject to argument, and amenable to reason,” he added. “I may be opposed to abortion for religious reasons, but if I seek to pass a law banning the practice, I cannot simply point to the teachings of my church or evoke God’s will. I have to explain why abortion violates some principle that is accessible to people of all faiths, including those with no faith at all.”

That is, as my theologian friend Al Mohler called it, “secularism with a smile” — offered in the form of an invitation for believers to show up, but then only to be allowed to make arguments that are not based in their deepest beliefs.

No you fucking Theocrat. It’s called reason. It’s call common sense. And it’s called democracy. We don’t live (yet) in your bloody-minded fundamentalist theocracy. If you had your way, homosexuals would be hanged, young girls would be forced to bear horribly deformed and soon-to-die children which were the result of being raped by their fathers, Women who exposed a breast would be stoned to death and no woman would be allowed to disagree with her husband.

WAKE UP AMERICA.  This isn’t Christianity. It’s the TALIBAN wearing a Jesus suit.

Posted in Rants, religion, Theocrat Watch | Tagged: , , , , | Leave a Comment »

Gotta love being married to a gun-loving girl

Posted by Bill Nance on November 27, 2008

My wife just looked at a web-site about “assault weapons.” Her comment?

“It’s not gonna go ‘splodie killing spree all by itself!”

Posted in firearms, Guns Dammit!, Miscellaneous | Tagged: , , | 1 Comment »

The best reason to reject religion

Posted by Bill Nance on November 26, 2008

“Reason is the greatest enemy that faith has: it never comes to the aid of spiritual things, but, more frequently than not, struggles against the divine Word” -Martin Luther.

If there is a God (who knows?) and if that God intervenes or particularly cares what we think or believe here on planet earth (highly doubtful) you’d think that God would give us some evidence. Absent that, divine condemnation for failing to believe in magic without evidence merely because some goof in a dress says it’s so, is Evil.

Posted in religion | Tagged: , , | 2 Comments »

Government bailouts and “helicopter parents.”

Posted by Bill Nance on November 26, 2008

There’s an interesting column today in the Detroit Free press about accountability, bailouts and parenting.

The Juice:

You can hardly walk into a public school these days without hearing about helicopter parents and the damage they are inflicting on the current generation of American schoolchildren.
In the latest edition of their classic, “Parenting with Love and Logic,” parenting gurus Foster Cline and Jim Fay (who coined the term a generation ago) argue that moms and dads who are “forever running lunches, permission slips, band instruments and homework assignments to school” are short-circuiting the natural consequences that teach children to take responsibility for their actions and omissions.

“The real world does not run on the bailout principal,” the authors warn. “Traffic tickets, overdue bills, irresponsible people, crippling diseases, taxes — these and other normal events of adult life usually do not disappear because a loving benefactor bails us out.”

Well, no — not usually.

But these are hardly usual times. And since 2006, when Cline and Fay wrote those words, the bailout principle has been making a big comeback wherever the real world threatens to exact a price for irresponsible behavior.

Something to think about…

Posted in economy, education, Miscellaneous | Tagged: , , , | Leave a Comment »

Imagine that: A judge says it’s not his business to dictate election rules.

Posted by Bill Nance on November 26, 2008

I just caught this tidbit in the Dallas Morning News:

State District Judge Jim Jordan on Tuesday said legal questions over how best to conduct a recount in the House District 105 race should be addressed. But, he said, his court wasn’t the correct venue for it.

“I was looking forward to this case,” Judge Jordan said in ruling that only an appellate or the state Supreme Court has jurisdiction. “It has some interesting issues I would have enjoyed working with. And it has issues that need dealing with.”

Judge Jordan issued his jurisdictional ruling after hearing all the evidence and testimony in the case that centers around two hot-button election issues — straight-party voting and electronic voting machines.

It’s call judicial restraint. Something the U.S. Supreme court might look into.

Posted in Law & Order, Politics | Tagged: , , | Leave a Comment »